I have never met Beyonce or Jay-Z so this entry here is off of just pure opinion and the things that I have witnessed over the years by watching this power couple. I remember back when I had just finished High School, rumors were swirling that Beyonce and Jay-Z were a couple. Back then that was just the craziest ish in the world. Jay-Z was such an asshole and a playa and I couldn’t understand how a “nice girl” like Beyonce could even talk to him. I was so against this relationship, lol.
As time moved on, I started to see them on vacation and with each picture I saw him gradually become more and more comfortable with the thought of being in love. Once I saw this real Brooklyn dude rock open toe sandals on the beach, I said, she got him.
Many years later, Beyonce performs this song “Love on Top” on the MTV Music Awards, and I can’t lie, it touched me when she was performing it because she went innnnnnnnn. I instantly fell in love with the song. For that was a great moment for pop culture and fans a like who watched this couple flourish. Hell, I told my girls, she should rub her stomach at the end to really make people sick and in true virgo fashion, she did it at the end of the performance. I watched Jay-Z salute his woman and thought…damn Beyonce has the life.
Now that I have been in my own relationship for years and I do this love thing as a career, I understand what makes Jay-Z and Bey’s relationship so great…It’s not the money or the fame or the power (because there are many wealthy people together)…It’s what they put into each other…which is time!
Time is something that many of us women don’t respect but what most real dudes live by. They could date a woman for years and not be in love with her and she can know this and stick it out. Her friends will laugh at her and her mother will tell her to leave him and she stays because he is doing enough for her to be able to see the big picture of their romantic love affair.
I believe that Beyonce was one of those women. She is a virgo and the one thing us virgoes do is stick it out for the long term when we fall in love. We are not for the bullcrap; if we meet and date you and you make us feel a way we have never felt before, we are on you like white on rice. So Beyonce met and fell in love with Jay-Z and made a promise to herself that she wasn’t letting him go. Yes, “she fought through her tears.”
So the song “Love on Top” is about the moment she realized that Jay-Z felt the way that she did. He began to treat her like the Queen she had always imagined and decided to put her on top (“You’re the one that always call”) of everything even his image and his career as a rapper/mogul.
Maybe it was something he said but my guess was it was in his mannerisms and in the way he let his guard down. Beyonce had that baby (whether you think she had it or not) because she knew like what my father always told us, a marriage isn’t a marriage until you have a baby. She knew that having Blue would complete their family structure as man and wife. She also had that baby to show Jay-Z that she was willing to sacrifice her career and her image as a sex kitten to complete their legacy. I know this because I have no children and I when I do, I believe that me having a child would be the gift I give to my man for being so damn wonderful (a baby is a gift to a man because he can’t push out a child).
Having a child for a business woman is a very big thing. Babies change the dynamics of a relationship; now you can’t just get up and leave and do whatever because now you two have created something that you can’t see someone else raise. You created greatness; a formula that could never be created again with another person.
I know Jay-Z is a different man and put her love on top because Beyonce walks out the house now not matching and he still be on her like flies to shit. Look back at Beyonce’s old photos with Jay Z; you would never see Beyonce walking around looking untidy. She no longer has to front for the world and put on the best threads anymore because Jay let’s her know that she is that bish with or without all the glamour (but watch it Bey, don’t have that baby and get all comfortable).
Also, He no longer walks ten steps in front of her but help her across the street. Back in the days, Beyonce will walk all the way behind him and Jay would allow for the security to make sure his lady didn’t stumble in those heels.
He realizes now that being in love and putting her love on top doesn’t make him a punk but a real man. A real man is his woman’s first bodyguard. I learned this from many days of walking outside with my man (during the reality show hay day) and he protecting me from certain situations like when a woman came up to me and kept hitting my arm. He gladly told her to back her ass up.
Anyway,
In the end of the day, nothing is better than when a man feels the way you feel and does the things you always imagined he would do for you. In any relationship, if you want greatness you have to put in the real time and energy into it. You have to make the decisions as individuals to take the time and get to know each other; allow him to learn your likes and your dislikes. Trust him enough to tell him your dreams and just don’t believe stuff based on words but on actions because no matter how much patience Beyonce had, Jay-Z had to show her that there was something to wait for.
He finally put her love on top of his own needs or wants because he saw that she was something worthy of MORE. A real dude knows your worth and knows that his life wouldn’t be it’s best if he didn’t have you along with him riding through it. This is where you want your man…This is how you want him to feel but unfortunately that take some time; it doesn’t happen over night.
So remember, everyone wants a Jay-Z but everyone is not a Beyonce. Work on your self-worth and everything will work out for you in this love thing. He will put your love top when you put your OWN love on top.
Go Beyonce!
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WOW….you are AWESOME!!! I love it!!
I love this Tionna!
Like always Boss Tionna knows her shit!!! Great job good read just like your books!!
I absolutely love you girl , and I will be ordering your books this week, keep up the good work .
Your piece was thought provoking. However, what happens when after the children, the ambition doesn’t leave? I know that I know that my destiny involves an equal if not more time in the spotlight than my future husband even after the kids. What then? It’s all so complex…
Tionna,
Once again you hit it right on the head. Beyonce was determined to put in the time and ring the alarm if she had to. Like she warned tricks in her song. I think they truly loved each other and still do. However; I think their relationship was in trouble and once she had Blue that sealed it for him. He always knew what he had in Beyonce
but now it’s like he fell in love with completely
and deeply since she gave birth to his child. When a man of Jay Z stature is respecting, saluting
Well said!!!!!!!!!!!;-)
I love it! I agree, woman r not focusing on there self worth. I just getting that & now I’m practicing it. I love that song. B jus show the world I’m human & I go threw what u go threw! I love her! U go girl!
Self-Worth is #1 when it comes down to a man
Hey Tionna,
I came across this article on another website and I was surprise to see your name at the end of it. The article has a great outlook on love and relationships. I am so proud of all the great things you are doing with your life!
I SO LOVE THIS I JUST SEEN YOU POST A LINK ON TWITTER WORDS CANT EVEN EXPLAIN WHAT YOU JUST SAID IN THIS BLOG IT DEFINTLEY GIVES ME A SECOND LOOK ON RELATIIONSHIPS.. I WANNA HAVE MY LOVE ON TOP GREAT NO WONDERFUL BLOG!!
Thank you so much. It’s all about a man putting you and your love on top!
Loved this!!! Great insight into their relationship…
Tionna, you NEVER disappoint. Surely you’re wise beyond your years. You’ve more than proven yourself as someone we can look to for good solid real advice. Thank you!
thank you so much
Tionne why is it that virgos are so patience, we really don”t know how to let go, we are their to the end!!!
That article is very gay! I mean Jay is not the guy that he makes people think that he is! She’s makin all da music on him, but he doesn’t make any about her!
It’s not gay!!!!!! Everyone expresses love differently. Making a song for someone doesn’t mean you love them unconditionally and he has referenced her in many songs. Hey this is just all my opinion.
You are obviously not listening to the words/lyrics in jay z’s music!!!…
i love it! this was great i like how you did this
You said it best Tionna!! It took a minute for me to understand that and now that I know….let’s just say I got the greatest man, then ring, and then wedding of my dreams last November! (Not all at one time, of course
) Great job on the break down of the song!
Yassssssss my thoughts exactly.. The more I would listen to this song the more I fell in love with it and understood the depts of it…. Bey was letting the world know this wasnt no over night thing…. “Finally he put my love on top” ..
Damn!!! Tionna you are great!!!
Badass …. Need I say more
I think your views are very on point. And hopefully many of us can use this valuable information to mold our own relationships. Thanks
Omg!!!!! Girl you better go! I hope some how Bey reads this! I know she would love it!
Ms. Smalls,
I commend you for such an insightful article on what it takes to make a relationship work: time. I wish more sisters would realize the success of one’s long term relationship and/ or marriage depends on how much sacrifice and time they’re willing to put in their relationship.
Spoken like a true “been there, done that boss”
Bless,
Yagga
@Spectromix
Great post, T!
This article was so on point!!!!
Yessssssss Tionna!! I loved this post. Although I read the whole thing and my favorite line was “Everyone wants a Jay-Z, but everyone is not a Beyonce.” Yes CHECKMATE!! Can’t wait for a post on Will and Jada. *Hint Hint* lol!
Wow Tionna, Me as a happily married woman can still work on myself. Reading this blog brought tears to my eyes. It reminds me, that in a relationships it will always take two. You have to be willing to do your part in a relationship, in order to make it successful.
Well Said T ! They are definitely one of my fav couple!
yes,love it
Loved this post! Something definitely to think about. You did your thing Tionna. I know one day I’ll have my love on top. But self worth is the key!!
I love this! I said the same thing when I heard the song!
Reblogged this on Rated eM and commented:
I absolutely love this post by Tionna Smalls! Enjoy!
Soooooo true!!! I have lived it as well..and patience is well worth the reality of love. I’m not a virgo..but an earth sign nonetheless(taurus)..and we believe in the same perserverence for love. Amor Vincit Omnia!:)
Girl you are so good at what u do I’m so proud and happy for you love always your sister gigi
Thx u sis!
OMG yes *tears shit real
Awesome post! Love is so beautiful!